Maoking’s Weblog

January 18, 2015

A list of what to do

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 11:09 am

1. Valentine’s Day

– Exploding box?

-photo frame with scrapbooking

2. Birthday

– Universal Studios

-Quayside isle for dinner

3. Anniversary 

– bake him a cake?

– cook for him?

September 9, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 6:05 am

On days like this, i wished you could just give me a tight hug and say that it’s okay. Having mood swing is totally fine.

But sadly to say, we both know you will never do that.

Why is it so difficult to be in a relationship?

May 22, 2014

When will enough ever be enough?

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 3:11 pm

Sometimes I wished you knew. 

Sometimes I wished you could be as needy as I am, wanting to spend every second of my life with you next to my side. 

Sometimes I wonder if we are really suitable for each other; because we are totally complete opposite of each other. 

As much as I am trying to be all understanding with regards to how attached to your family you actually are, I wished you could spend more time with me. Maybe I’m being too unappreciative. Maybe I’m just not suitable to be in a relationship. Maybe… I’m just trying to be ME. We talked about expectations, and they always say “Expectations always lead to disappointment”. But how about saying that expectations means we care, it means we are looking for something to keep us motivated, something to work towards, somewhere to head towards.

It’s always past midnight and here I am typing, or should I say, rambling. I wished you knew. I wished you know how uncertain I am feeling right now at this moment. I wished… yet I’m never gonna say, because I guess I have said enough. Once is enough my dear. I’m not gonna repeat myself. I’m holding onto to this relationship which I call it LOVE. But who am I to say I know how to love when I have never loved anyone before. How strong would this reason be. How long would this reason last?

People gonna tell me that I’m being childish. I’m just not knowing how to appreciate what I already have. I know. I really do. I see your good as well. I always do. But I guess to me, I don’t need any gifts, neither do I need you to bring me to expensive places for our dates. I just need something that is free. Something called “Time”. 

Zeus, is that too much to ask for?

April 5, 2014

Second date. MBS Pepperiza Mozza 4th apr

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 2:23 am

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Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 2:22 am

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March 23, 2014

I’m attached. Omg

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 12:26 am

Hi there. Yes i totally feel like i’m talking to myself now. And you know what? I dont even remember the existence of this blog omg. It’s first post was dated way back in 2007, a year after the departure of Jinxiao. Ah… those were the days, when i used to cry so badly during breaks because I couldnt accept his leaving. It felt so bad to see him leaving, as Jinxiao was the only guy in school who was willing to sit down and talk to a 97kg girl.

Had been thinking to myself that it’s time to create a blog and pen down every single details and moments with zeus. So here it goes.

As of 21.03.2014, I’m attached.

Yes. I am.

Until now; even two days after i’ve been officially together with you, i still find it difficult to believe that it happened already. I remember how it all started, when my impression of you was so high up there because you were such a nice and humble guy. You didnt mind doing all the dirty jobs like what emily woo mentioned theoretically in class about “Good guys”. My first interaction with you was at serangoon NEX, when you arranged the three of us, including zack, to meet and buy the groceries together at the the shopping mall because you didnt want to inconvenient both of us since we stay along the NEL. Instead, you took the hassle to travel from your home all the way to Serangoon. That’s when I first took notice of you.

Fast forward to 2014. I was lucky to be pinpointed by the seniors and in charge of the wine appreciation event. That was what really brought us both much closer together though. I remember how we used to text about wine stuff every single day and how i cracked my head thinking of ways to carry on the conversation with you so that the communication doesn’t end. Then came the urge to give up a week before Valentine’s day, because while seeking for opinions from one of my friends in class on whether I should make you something to express my feelings subtly, his reply was “Cat, i think you don’t give better. Later he reject you i doubt you can take it.” #burned

If anyone was to ask me who fell for who first between the both of us, i think i would bravely say “it’s me”. Until today it still feels kind of surreal to me how things changed so quickly between the both of us. It was less than 3 months ago when I started telling my friends outside of school that there is this particular guy in my cca who is freaking nice. “His nice level is UP THERE ONE”, i would tell them. Some would pour cold water on me and say things like “Haiyah, you are forever exaggerating one”, while my less-mocky-friends would say “Then go for it, cat! Make him like you! Then your dream will finally come true!”

But you know what? Sometimes I really wonder what is it about me that made you fell for me. Neither am i pretty nor do i have the figure which most of my friends have. I am loud and talkative, unlike your introvert character trait. I tend to procrastinate and do things last minute, while you’re always on track, always so serious about everything, making your life to be as perfect as you desire it to be. I have so many flaws, so so many that I doubt you have ever seen. I am bossy and I am possessive. I chew with my mouth open when I’m with people that I am comfortable with, and I talk so loud whenever I am excited that people sitting on the next table may turn and give me a judging look.

I have no experience on being in a relationship to be the most perfect girl you are seeking out for. But i promise, i will try. I know you are not always online on whatsapp just like me. I put myself in your shoes and try to understand you better. As much as I’ve been saying how redundant it is to worry for some things which have yet to take place, i can’t help but to feel worried about what’s lying ahead of us. “Will we be able to work towards the same future smoothly over the years? Are we going a little too fast? What if things do not work out? What if….. what if….”

” “If only” are the two saddest words in the world”

I remember vividly how this quote used to be my favourite when i was younger. It reminds me of the phrase “Never try, never know”. It’s too late to turn back the time now though. We are both aware of what we really want. I really want to spend the rest of my life with you. With a guy whom I know will be there for me physically and emotionally no matter what happens. The path lying in front of us may not be a smooth sailing one. There are so many things which the both of us do not know. But that’s alright, we will fall; we will stop. We will hold each other’s hands and stand up together. We will be fine ♡

January 4, 2013

shirk all responsibilities – thats what mauritians are best at doing

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 9:15 pm

i damn pissed. like freaking pissed now.

fuck those russia  guests who are so demanding and asking for poker cards in the middle of the night and get so angry when there isnt any cards for them

fuck these selfish ppl, making interns the bad person, when we dun hav rooms, and then the guests are like so hard to please and they obviously know that and let us be the scapegoats

will such things happen in singapore as well?

long term thinking… singaporean management may not do it because at the end of the day, they will be blamed for all the wrongdoings by the trainees

but in mauritius? they just wave off all responsibilities if they can.

fuck all these people!

鸵鸟的心态

January 2, 2013

New year resolution

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 2:34 pm

Need to take some time to type out a new year resolution for myself or i foresee idiot ho nagging at me and tiewing non stop.

In 2013, i hope that i can:

  • enter a local uni and get into my desired course
  • lose at least 5kg compared to my current weight (i know i know i have been saying this for like 10 million times but as the saying goes “it’s never too late to be what you would have been”)
  • master the art of baking
  • eat less, exercise more
  • get into the directors list and graduate from TP with merit 
  • maintain all the friendships with the special ones in my life 

That’s all for now! I have no idea why i feel damn useless looking at my own resolutions for 2013… they seem too easily achieved that i feel a little goal-less now… LOL.

and idiot ho! 

I have no idea why but im missing you a lot suddenly…
HAHAHAHAH IT MUST BE THE CYCLONE THAT’S COMING, MAKING ME MISS ALL THOSE PEOPLE WHO ARE IMPORTANT IN MY LIFE. 

 

Filed under: Uncategorized — Thought Catalog @ 2:15 pm

New year resolution.

December 14, 2007

A brand new start!!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — maoking @ 3:46 am

Alright man!!

I was influenced by someone and finally decided to set up a blog for myself, without telling anyone, unless necessary, that it actually exists ^___^ wells, school’s gonna reopen in few days time, the so called “looking forward to xmas celebrations” day has been ruined because my Msia relatives aren’t coming in to Singapore next week !!! -_-lll

Time for me to go on a diet!!!! I know i’ve been reminding myself tonnes of times, BUT… you know, it’s easier to be said than done. GRRRRRRR~~!!! Jinxiao’s gone for more than a year and no fats have been lost!!!!!!! WAHHHHHHHHHHH~! IM GOING BERSERK SOON!!!!

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